Heidegger, D. and me

I love Heidegger for his complexity, his contradiction, his philosophy and his love affair with Hannah A.

I think I am having a kierkegaardian love affair with D.

A kiss on the cheek, babe.

The Schopenhauer Syndrom

A. Schopenhauer 1788-1860, that I intimely named Schopy, used to hate Hegel.

At the beginning of 1820, Schopenhauer advertised a course of lectures to be given at the same time as George Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel's (1770-1831),

but when Hegel attracted more students the course did not proceed.

Since this time, he spent his whole life hating Hegel and his philosophy.

He lived in relative isolation, preferring the company of dogs to people.

"Five-sixths of human beings are worth only contempt", he once wrote.

It was claimed, that he once pushed a neighbor down a flight of stairs for disturbing him. For the unlucky woman, a seamstress named Caroline Luise Marguet, who could not continue in her former profession, he had to pay 60 talers for the rest of her life.

I love Schopy :)

Atlantic city

Now I have been looking for a life, but it's hard to find,
Down here it's just loosers and winers and don't get caught on the wrong side of that line
Well I'm tired of goin' out and searching for the ladder to climb.
Just keep quiet and play the role,
Rising above anything.

Well now everything dies baby that's a fact,
But maybe everything that dies someday comes back
Put your makeup on fix your hair up pretty
And meet me tonight in Atlantic City

In the red corner

Freaking Loser

When I have been told at my office:
- "Zoa, u got to go to Nice!",
I though: "Nice ? Nice !"

La riviera, Dick Rivers (which are not rivers of dicks but a famous french singer)
And my mind was already imagining la promenade des anglais:


As they used to book me nice hotel like Sheraton, Hilton, etc...
I said : "Great"!
The problem is that they did not precise Sophia-Antipolis,
which means a business area in a day and bloody-freaky-no man's land at night.

I have been fooled !!!! Here is my hotel view:


Dolores, look at that and weep !!!
Because you were suposed to be here with me !!!

Finally,
I escaped to go to work and I am writing from la promenade des anglais.
Where guys are used to touch their dick while talking to you,
and women are wannabe blond and panther-dressed.
It feels like being in a city for transexual holidays.

Quicksand

I'm closer to the Golden Dawn
Immersed in Crowley's uniform
Of imagery
I'm living in a silent film
Portraying Himmler's sacred realm
Of dream reality

I'm frightened by the total goal
Drawing to the ragged hole
I'm sinking in the quicksand of my thought
And I ain't got the power anymore
No I ain't got the power anymore

I'm the twisted name on Garbo's eyes
Living proof of DeGaulle's lies

I'm destiny

I'm torn between the light and dark
Where others see their targets
Divine symmetry

Should I kiss the viper's fang ?
Or herald loud the death of Man
I'm sinking in the quicksand of my thought
And I ain't got the power anymore

I'm not a prophet or a stone age man
Just a mortal with the potential of a superman
I'm living on
I'm tethered to the logic of Homo Sapien

Can't take my eyes from the great salvation
Of bullshit faith
If I don't explain what you ought to know
You can tell me all about it
On the next Bardo...


I will be in the city of sin on July the 12th.
X vienes ? di q si !

Dolores (autorized by Blandish)

Dolores is getting married !!!
When we had this conversation on the phone she told me:
- "How weird it is, isn't ?
- Yeah", I told her.
"No more cocaine and threesome nights..."
Then she laughed.


I met Dolores in our common office in late 1999.

I get to know her while I was having sex with Ph. K. in her flat, after her big-unforgettable-Ph.D. party.
Dolo cares about those moments when you really need something like a condom or anything else.
I really knew her in a still magical trip in Miami.
She became my friend.


Many people may think that she is blue eyed or dumb...
I think that she is from those people that are kind and naive.

I care for you.

Here is the Dolores I am talking about.

In touch

At this office, nothing to do but get in touch with old friends...


F. is thinking about me (so do I every single day),
T. is missing me (kiss from a rose),
B. wants to see me,
Ph. has so much things to tell me for she is married.

P. wants to sleep with me (Why not?).
O. is willing to date me (in spain).
H. is secretly in love with me (so do I, I am found of the spirit if this old married fellow).

MLM is so sad for she has been left alone and adult.
HC is also sad and has a new Vice CEO job, he quit drinking (I quit smoking two years ago with him).
R. has a baby with Ph.

C. & T. will have another adventure together (T. has been fired),
My sister is leaving spain for France,
Ph Came back from one year in Rio,
B. left Miami for Lyon,

R.S. has left the city and is living in the country side and spend some nights in Bordeaux,
A.H. is between Paris and Stuttgart,
D is retired, so do Tartine,
H. came back from China,
M. is divorcing,


I wanna leave/live.
I also want a new job,
guess what ?
I have an interview in June far from here.

Tomorrow, I'll take the plane.
& I'll shave...

Sentimental Mood

I know and I don't care.

I feel sentimental,
I feel like taking up the road...again...
this life is not for me.

Next trip in two days.

Can someone come and find me in this nowhere place?

First Single week end

Look at those hands. I have beautiful long and thin hands.

Let's take care about them and keep them busy...

I am back to here...

Yeah okay, I am beautiful and single once again.

I received some words from my past (Yes I always think about..., every single day).

Give the past his due and bring me another lover !

Let's start the adventure :

Yesterday, first dinner with a clever nice guy and good white wine.

I feel so free...

Beirut

Is cancelled.

What is life ?

About intuiton,

I dreamt that I will die there.
I will not go.

Veve wandering in the MET

Isn't he handsome ?

Veve is a tremandous guy that hold a Ph.D., and knows everything about saunas as well as Pierre Bonnard or Aristotle...

This guy has changed my life. When I met him, in 2002, I was living in Danemark.

One year later, I came back to France and start a job with him.

I laughed so much with him,

I learned so much,

I thought so much.

This summer we went to Philly to a gay, lesbians, friends and family meeting,

and in NYC, he took me to a gay-gentlemen only hotel, saying that I was a drag.

He ate a banana, I took a photo.

We are friends for I know his dark side and he knows mine.

Brida

Strange attractors...

I bougth this book in Amsterdam,
waiting a bloody plane.

I do not like Cuelo.
It was the only book in english.
This book is made for teenagers of all age.

So far,
I liked it,
I liked it in the morning,
I liked it in the evening...
It was a kind of addiction.
I read it and now I am looking for another addiction.

I am feeling very strange these days.
Just like having no limits and not being ashamed of that.

Paolo, you just convince me.

Let's F***

Casablanca

I am in a Palace.

I am a lonely tall-dark-hair lady and I read.
They stare at me, strange attractors.

Goodbye

Just like Philadelphia
Freedom means a lot to me
In between the place I've been
And where I'm goin'

And I would lay your body down
And rock your tears away
But it's much too late from now
To be like yesterday
And the time is running out
We still have to say Goodbye

Remember Philadelphia